Jump to content

Western Civilization’s Last Stand

The Art of The Argument

Available Now | artoftheargument.com

Freedomain Radio Amazon Affiliate Links: United States - Canada - United Kingdom

Sign up for the Freedomain Mailing List: fdrurl.com/newsletter

Mole

I need to figure out what this short, interesting dream means

Recommended Posts

Mole    7

Some background information. I have a girlfriend. I love her although I haven't fallen in love (no nirvana). She's my first girlfriend and we have been together for about 5 months. I wish we saw each other more once or twice a week, but it's not practical to do that. Every time we get together I feel deeper for her, I think it's a great thing. Despite this, I do have depressive symptoms (not depression) and I do sometimes feel inferior to people around me, or at least to what I should be. My father ran away from his daughter when he was 18 and ran away from me when he was 45-50 and when I was about 7. I am now almost 20 years old. So he ran away twice, keep this in mind. On to the dream...

 

I am at the local beach with my girlfriend, although, I call my girlfriend my daughter in the dream. I think it was some time in the evening but I can't specifically remember if it was really night time or if it was day time. She turns her back away from me and I run away from her as fast as I can. For some reason, I had the desire to lose her. I run right along behind the bushes which run parallel to the beach. She looks through the bushes from the other side and sees me running away from her. She catches up to me along the footpath that's next to the beach but on the other side of the bushes that I'm running along. She gives me a big hug and I say "I'm not good enough". She turns her back and I run away again. She's faster than me and she catches up to me again. Then the dream totally transformed into something else.

 

This dream is short but probably has some very powerful meaning! There are so many ways of looking at this. Is she superior because she runs faster than me? Is this a sign that my dad felt inferior? Am I actually the daughter -- Should I try harder to find my dad? Why is my girlfriend also my daughter? I am not smart enough to figure out this dream on my own but I'm pretty sure this dream means something. I have no desire to run away from my girlfriend, even though it's true I sometimes don't feel 'good enough'. It should also be noted that I occasionally used to have very powerful dreams of falling in love with strangers. Pure ecstasy. I always wonder if that feeling could ever happen to me.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Boss    33

The only inferior person I can tell from this story is your dad. Running away from the child you created is inferior to any other dad that stayed and helped raise his child. In the dream, it sounds like you were like your dad running away from someone you "love". You may be subconsciously thinking since your dad ran away from his daughter and you that, that is what you should be doing to people you "love", if you love her, you run away. Running away from someone you love is obviously wrong. I am also not sure why you feel inferior, but, im guessing its because of your dad. I recommend you fully recognize the terrible mistakes your dad did to you so you dont repeat them. Therapy is a proven way to do that.

I should note this is just my guess, I am in no way an expert. However, I truly wish you well.

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree, and it seems like you are scared of rejecting your girlfriend and repeating your dad's patterns, but also afraid of accepting yourself the way you need to in order to accept her. Then there is further not knowing whether that is the right thing to do...It may only seem that way because you are either avoiding or replicating your dad's patterns. But you need a better heuristic than that to decide whether to commit to her. You have to move past the decision of whether to do what he does or the opposite of what he does. You have to think for yourself.

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

females = subconscious / unconscious aspects of you

daughter = young or immature idea of yourself depending on age

running away = running away from yourself 

lighting = level of awareness

 

Personal relationships with the opposite sex offer opportunities to see aspects of yourself of which you would not otherwise know. That is what you are running from. She keeps up and is still there so there is some awareness that you can't really get away from yourself. It's like you are playing cat and mouse with your desire to understand who you are. 

 

What happened when the dream changed? 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Mole    7

females = subconscious / unconscious aspects of you

daughter = young or immature idea of yourself depending on age

running away = running away from yourself 

lighting = level of awareness

 

Personal relationships with the opposite sex offer opportunities to see aspects of yourself of which you would not otherwise know. That is what you are running from. She keeps up and is still there so there is some awareness that you can't really get away from yourself. It's like you are playing cat and mouse with your desire to understand who you are. 

 

What happened when the dream changed? 

Something about a Japanese Buddhist and playing bollywood music to a taxi driver over the phone.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Spenc    58

You mention some important details that indicate you are far from deep self-knowledge.  So you love her, but are not fallen-in-love with her, which of course you cannot if you cannot have self-knowledge, self-esteem and a rational love of yourself.

 

This isn't an analysis of your dream, but I would point out that relationships can kind of lock a person in to their current self, in a way.  Oftentimes, if you first meet and get along with someone at a point of low self-knowledge, then as you improve yourself you risk the relationship because it presents the possibility or likelihood of the two people growing apart.  So it often becomes comfortable for people to stop growing in order to serve the needs of the relationship, which people are often co-dependent on for self-worth.

 

The fact that your girlfriend is interested in you while you display symptoms of depression and lacking of self-worth says soemthing about her own self-esteem as well.  Women generally have keen eyes to spot these things and reject the men who portray these traits, and beyond that, seek out the exact opposite traits instead.  So I wouldn't assume this dream means that your girlfriend is some beacon of love and virtue that your subconscious wants you to fall madly in love with.  That may be the case--I'm just going off what little information you have provided plus my own personal experience--but I hope you'll equally consider the opposite as well.

 

The "I'm not good enough" stuff might be that you are not good enough for yourself--meaning, you have a conviction that self-knowledge is fundamental to your ultimate happiness but that you are still well short of achieving that level of love and accomplishment within yourself.  And while you try to simultaneously have a relationship and find love for another person, when you've not yet achieved it for yourself, you are skipping a step and then the relationship becomes a pathway that leads you away from the necessary steps that you have now skipped and left long behind.

 

Again, this only one of many possible messages that may or may apply to your situation.  I hope you have a relationship wherein you can discuss these topics openly with your SO, as I'm sure that would be really enlightening for you to have conversations like this with her

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Mole    7

You mention some important details that indicate you are far from deep self-knowledge.  So you love her, but are not fallen-in-love with her, which of course you cannot if you cannot have self-knowledge, self-esteem and a rational love of yourself.

 

This isn't an analysis of your dream, but I would point out that relationships can kind of lock a person in to their current self, in a way.  Oftentimes, if you first meet and get along with someone at a point of low self-knowledge, then as you improve yourself you risk the relationship because it presents the possibility or likelihood of the two people growing apart.  So it often becomes comfortable for people to stop growing in order to serve the needs of the relationship, which people are often co-dependent on for self-worth.

 

The fact that your girlfriend is interested in you while you display symptoms of depression and lacking of self-worth says soemthing about her own self-esteem as well.  Women generally have keen eyes to spot these things and reject the men who portray these traits, and beyond that, seek out the exact opposite traits instead.  So I wouldn't assume this dream means that your girlfriend is some beacon of love and virtue that your subconscious wants you to fall madly in love with.  That may be the case--I'm just going off what little information you have provided plus my own personal experience--but I hope you'll equally consider the opposite as well.

 

The "I'm not good enough" stuff might be that you are not good enough for yourself--meaning, you have a conviction that self-knowledge is fundamental to your ultimate happiness but that you are still well short of achieving that level of love and accomplishment within yourself.  And while you try to simultaneously have a relationship and find love for another person, when you've not yet achieved it for yourself, you are skipping a step and then the relationship becomes a pathway that leads you away from the necessary steps that you have now skipped and left long behind.

 

Again, this only one of many possible messages that may or may apply to your situation.  I hope you have a relationship wherein you can discuss these topics openly with your SO, as I'm sure that would be really enlightening for you to have conversations like this with her

I do talk about it openly, and I hope you understand that being too open can be hurtful to any relationship because temporary thoughts can arise that after more consideration you don't actually mean it, realise you didn't communicate it properly or was being controlled by your unconscious mind. Don't take my word for it, Stefan the lord and saviour has said so himself that it is a bad idea to say everything that comes to mind in a relationship (I don't mean that in a patronising way). So, when you say you hope I have a relationship wherein I can discuss these topics openly, I hope you consider this perspective. I have already been too open with her, and it ends up in a mess of misunderstanding and being LESS able to empathise with each other. She says I'm one of the most honest and frank people she has ever met.

 

I have thought about the proposition that people have low self-esteem because they lack self-knowledge and that people of low self-esteem may attract each other and not really love each other. I believe this is what you are trying to say and please correct me if I have misunderstood you. I'm trying my least to make assumptions. It is brought up again and again. However, it is not something I connect to. In fact, most of the things brought up in this community, I don't fully understand and can't imagine how it applies to my life.

 

She did not know I was depressive until I told her so why would she reject me? She has explicitly told me she did not consciously know I have low self-esteem until I told her. Why does that say something about her own self-esteem? You say women have a keen eye for these things. You do understand that I'm not always depressed and don't always have self loathing. From my limited, humble perspective, she has very high self-esteem. She claims to have great self-knowledge and I cannot find evidence to doubt that. In fact, I only have reason to believe it given her life transformations and incredibly high self-determination. Does my low self-esteem come from low self-knowledge or something more trivial like my sociability? And what is falling in love? Perhaps our experiences are too different. Your hypothesis is beautiful, but I'm having trouble understanding how it makes sense in my life mate. Either other community members are naive and take what is said in this community for granted, they find it applicable in their lives, or my understanding is defective. I spent 3 bloody hours last night just trying to figure out what the hell the unconscious mind is. I admit it, I don't know anything! It's extremely frustrating. It could be a proof of my lack of self-knowledge. I guess I could have a better idea by asking you this question: are the concerns and questions I have raised above at least possibly reasonable in your perspective? Maybe I only have a very surface level understanding of what you are trying to say.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Spenc    58

I do talk about it openly, and I hope you understand that being too open can be hurtful to any relationship because temporary thoughts can arise that after more consideration you don't actually mean it, realise you didn't communicate it properly or was being controlled by your unconscious mind. Don't take my word for it, Stefan the lord and saviour has said so himself that it is a bad idea to say everything that comes to mind in a relationship (I don't mean that in a patronising way). So, when you say you hope I have a relationship wherein I can discuss these topics openly, I hope you consider this perspective. I have already been too open with her, and it ends up in a mess of misunderstanding and being LESS able to empathise with each other. She says I'm one of the most honest and frank people she has ever met.

I don't really know what you mean by this.  Can you give me an example of something of consequence you shouldn't talk about openly?  An example of why misunderstanding and lack of empathy occur?  How do you know that your 'temporary thoughts' aren't valid or worthy of discussion?  If you make inaccurate, irrational temporary judgments, isn't it important to understand WHY you are doing so, what your partner might be doing to set off this irrationality in you?  It seems like the type of thing that could be overcome through investigation.

 

And it's great she considers you honest, but of course, that is only applicable to the degree which she is honest. 

 

 

I have thought about the proposition that people have low self-esteem because they lack self-knowledge and that people of low self-esteem may attract each other and not really love each other. I believe this is what you are trying to say and please correct me if I have misunderstood you. I'm trying my least to make assumptions. It is brought up again and again. However, it is not something I connect to. In fact, most of the things brought up in this community, I don't fully understand and can't imagine how it applies to my life.

If you're not relating to that, then great!  Like I said, I'm just offering a different perspective than what I was seeing most of the other people post, to make sure you had a wider set of ideas to consider which might apply to you.

 

 

 

She did not know I was depressive until I told her so why would she reject me? She has explicitly told me she did not consciously know I have low self-esteem until I told her. Why does that say something about her own self-esteem? You say women have a keen eye for these things. You do understand that I'm not always depressed and don't always have self loathing. From my limited, humble perspective, she has very high self-esteem. She claims to have great self-knowledge and I cannot find evidence to doubt that. In fact, I only have reason to believe it given her life transformations and incredibly high self-determination.

 

Well, it's not like these things are just on the surface: they say that 9/10ths of communication is non-verbal, for example.  Obviously, you know this to be the case, given that you are posting about your subconscious providing information to you via a dream, which your conscious mind is struggling to interpret! 

 

SO did she really not pick up on the fact that you were facing periods of depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-worth?  That's a bit strange, right? If you're her boyfriend, you would think she would have a pretty good connection with you and recognize when you're feeling mentally unwell.  Or she did notice subconsciously, and ignored it consciously.  In either case, that seems like evidence to me that warrants doubt of her own claims of "great self-knowledge".

 

I'm glad to hear your depressive and self-esteem issues are infrequent instead of constant!  That's a welcome clarification.

 

 

Does my low self-esteem come from low self-knowledge or something more trivial like my sociability? And what is falling in love?

Sorry man, I don't know.  Maybe your lack of self-knowledge comes from your low self-esteem?  Chicken or egg?  Who knows?  You would need to speak to a therapist to untangle that knot, not me.

 

Well, it was you who said you "love" your girlfriend but "haven't fallen in love" with her.  SO why don't you present your definitions of love and falling in love?  Don't let me impose my definitions on you.  I could just be totally misunderstanding what you meant when you said that....

 

 

Perhaps our experiences are too different. Your hypothesis is beautiful, but I'm having trouble understanding how it makes sense in my life mate. Either other community members are naive and take what is said in this community for granted, they find it applicable in their lives, or my understanding is defective. I spent 3 bloody hours last night just trying to figure out what the hell the unconscious mind is. I admit it, I don't know anything! It's extremely frustrating. It could be a proof of my lack of self-knowledge. I guess I could have a better idea by asking you this question: are the concerns and questions I have raised above at least possibly reasonable in your perspective? Maybe I only have a very surface level understanding of what you are trying to say

 

My post may not be very relevant to you.  It was just one perspective that I felt was not presented and was worthy of consideration, because it would apply to some people in some cases, with some of the same limited circumstances that you outlined in the post.

 

Are your questions possibly reasonable to me?  Of course.  Basically, your post whittles down to:  "I don't think this hypothesis applies to me", would you agree?  That is totally reasonable!!  I'm no therapist, I have very limited information about you and your girlfriend. 

 

If you meant the questions in the original post, about your girlfriend being superior, your dad being inferior, perhaps finding your dad, etc....Those are all also worthy for your consideration, and the other posts made by others had some good stuff as well.  I just saw that they were all skewed toward the theory that your girlfriend is some beacon of light (which she may very well be), and I saw something in the dream that could question that theory and wanted to bring that to your attention as well so that you would be able to consider different perspectives.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Mole    7

I don't really know what you mean by this.  Can you give me an example of something of consequence you shouldn't talk about openly?  An example of why misunderstanding and lack of empathy occur?  How do you know that your 'temporary thoughts' aren't valid or worthy of discussion?  If you make inaccurate, irrational temporary judgments, isn't it important to understand WHY you are doing so, what your partner might be doing to set off this irrationality in you?  It seems like the type of thing that could be overcome through investigation.

 

And it's great she considers you honest, but of course, that is only applicable to the degree which she is honest. 

 

If you're not relating to that, then great!  Like I said, I'm just offering a different perspective than what I was seeing most of the other people post, to make sure you had a wider set of ideas to consider which might apply to you.

 

 

Well, it's not like these things are just on the surface: they say that 9/10ths of communication is non-verbal, for example.  Obviously, you know this to be the case, given that you are posting about your subconscious providing information to you via a dream, which your conscious mind is struggling to interpret! 

 

SO did she really not pick up on the fact that you were facing periods of depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-worth?  That's a bit strange, right? If you're her boyfriend, you would think she would have a pretty good connection with you and recognize when you're feeling mentally unwell.  Or she did notice subconsciously, and ignored it consciously.  In either case, that seems like evidence to me that warrants doubt of her own claims of "great self-knowledge".

 

I'm glad to hear your depressive and self-esteem issues are infrequent instead of constant!  That's a welcome clarification.

 

Sorry man, I don't know.  Maybe your lack of self-knowledge comes from your low self-esteem?  Chicken or egg?  Who knows?  You would need to speak to a therapist to untangle that knot, not me.

 

Well, it was you who said you "love" your girlfriend but "haven't fallen in love" with her.  SO why don't you present your definitions of love and falling in love?  Don't let me impose my definitions on you.  I could just be totally misunderstanding what you meant when you said that....

 

 

My post may not be very relevant to you.  It was just one perspective that I felt was not presented and was worthy of consideration, because it would apply to some people in some cases, with some of the same limited circumstances that you outlined in the post.

 

Are your questions possibly reasonable to me?  Of course.  Basically, your post whittles down to:  "I don't think this hypothesis applies to me", would you agree?  That is totally reasonable!!  I'm no therapist, I have very limited information about you and your girlfriend. 

 

If you meant the questions in the original post, about your girlfriend being superior, your dad being inferior, perhaps finding your dad, etc....Those are all also worthy for your consideration, and the other posts made by others had some good stuff as well.  I just saw that they were all skewed toward the theory that your girlfriend is some beacon of light (which she may very well be), and I saw something in the dream that could question that theory and wanted to bring that to your attention as well so that you would be able to consider different perspectives.

I really appreciate your reply and I agree with you except for some minor points. For example, I have great skepticism over the 9/10 of communication is non-verbal statistic. I'm glad we have shown agreement. What I'm trying to do in this conversation is understand your position more clearly to see whether it really does apply to me. I'm not sure how to use the reply options so I'm not going to quote you directly.

 

About the temporary thoughts thing, what I'm saying is that it is perfectly healthy for people to think about stuff without real meaning or consider views without adopting them. An example is perhaps your friend woke up with a massive pimple. They turn their head around and you just go in your head "That indeed is a massive pimple". Are you really going to spend time talking about it? Sure, you can but the other person is probably going to think you are implying something because people usually don't bring up something unless they want to exchange ideas and get feedback. That is communication. I agree with you that it is important to understand thoughts and judgements, and especially feelings. But I'm not talking about feelings. Another more serious example is questioning what is love. "Do I love my sister?". You can only know the answer if you critically think about it. After a quick think you will say "Of course, I can bring up many examples of when I was really happy with her and times I admired her virtue". I think the words I used in my other post suggested I meant more of a feely, unconscious bias judgement thing which is not what I mean. I would consider it very important to bring up something like "I felt anger when I saw my sister", or "I don't want to cook for her". I think those things exist in a different category to the skeptical nature of the mind which questions and considers everything, which is perfectly healthy. If you went to your sister and asked, "Do I love you?", she will assume you have some doubt. You don't have doubt, even if you were thinking about the question. I'm very skeptical, so I'm constantly asking such questions and I think it's a great thing because it shapes your understanding of concepts.

 

"SO did she really not pick up on the fact that you were facing periods of depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-worth?"

I don't know. She has said that she had one friend before who told her she had depression and she had never guessed. I may be stressed and sad at times, but when I talk to my girlfriend, that is something that is always part of the conversation because maybe I can be stressed and sad and interested in something at the same time. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I do find it difficult to imagine why she would think I'm depressive at the early stages of the relationship. Right now she can tell when I'm down or when I'm anxious and she has told me which shows she does connect to me at the moment on a level. Other times I'm not, and we really enjoy being with each other. She always says she likes the happy me, so why should I think she's attracted to the sad me? She often finds it hard to relate to me when I'm sad and when I tell her I have low self-esteem and I think it's reasonable to say that she has not faced these issues at the same level I have.

 

"SO why don't you present your definitions of love and falling in love?"

I should have given a definition in the original post, but the reason why I ask you this is because I think we probably would disagree on the definition given what you have said. My understand is that loving someone is the involuntary response to virtue if you are virtuous, but that this only grows over time and is a kind of sense of admiration, mutual respect, trust, support, likeness, etc. As I understand it, falling in love as it is often called is a deep hormonal response in the 'honeymoon period'. The big three. Lust, attachment and attraction. I don't see why those have to do something with virtue necessarily. From what I have read in RTR "The love bomb" and talking to others, this does not necessarily happen only to virtuous people. Perhaps I am wrong in that, but if I am, I want evidence or reason for why I should believe I'm wrong. Perhaps I misunderstood RTR, I'm only half way through.

 

Thanks again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Spenc    58

About the temporary thoughts thing, what I'm saying is that it is perfectly healthy for people to think about stuff without real meaning or consider views without adopting them. An example is perhaps your friend woke up with a massive pimple. They turn their head around and you just go in your head "That indeed is a massive pimple". Are you really going to spend time talking about it? Sure, you can but the other person is probably going to think you are implying something because people usually don't bring up something unless they want to exchange ideas and get feedback. That is communication. I agree with you that it is important to understand thoughts and judgements, and especially feelings. But I'm not talking about feelings. Another more serious example is questioning what is love. "Do I love my sister?". You can only know the answer if you critically think about it. After a quick think you will say "Of course, I can bring up many examples of when I was really happy with her and times I admired her virtue". I think the words I used in my other post suggested I meant more of a feely, unconscious bias judgement thing which is not what I mean. I would consider it very important to bring up something like "I felt anger when I saw my sister", or "I don't want to cook for her". I think those things exist in a different category to the skeptical nature of the mind which questions and considers everything, which is perfectly healthy. If you went to your sister and asked, "Do I love you?", she will assume you have some doubt. You don't have doubt, even if you were thinking about the question. I'm very skeptical, so I'm constantly asking such questions and I think it's a great thing because it shapes your understanding of concepts.

I would just like to rewind a bit because I'm a bit lost here.  You brought up the dream and with that, your girlfriend.  I said, in context of my reply to your post, that I hope you have the type of relationship where you can openly discuss your dream and possible meanings with her, as it would liekly be very enlightening, given that she is a featured character in the dream.  You replied that sometimes one can be "too open" and it would be harmful to a relationship.  I asked you to offer an example of "something of consequence" you shouldn't talk about openly.  You responded with not wanting to point out a pimple????  I'm not sure why we are even discussing this at all.  Again, I said, in complete context of just your dream and it's importance to you, that conversation with your girlfriend would likely be helpful.  I am curious why you would want to deflect that away to talking about the moral quandaries of politeness in the face of a pimple.

 

 

"SO did she really not pick up on the fact that you were facing periods of depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-worth?"

I don't know. She has said that she had one friend before who told her she had depression and she had never guessed. I may be stressed and sad at times, but when I talk to my girlfriend, that is something that is always part of the conversation because maybe I can be stressed and sad and interested in something at the same time. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I do find it difficult to imagine why she would think I'm depressive at the early stages of the relationship. Right now she can tell when I'm down or when I'm anxious and she has told me which shows she does connect to me at the moment on a level. Other times I'm not, and we really enjoy being with each other. She always says she likes the happy me, so why should I think she's attracted to the sad me? She often finds it hard to relate to me when I'm sad and when I tell her I have low self-esteem and I think it's reasonable to say that she has not faced these issues at the same level I have.

Ok, I dont know you so I cannot speak to your behaviors and what you're like.  It's certainly good news that she seems to be more connected to you now and can better empathize with your mood.  Lastly, I wasn't saying that she would be "attracted to the sad you", more that she might have a blind spot or lack of skills in assessing people.  I'm not suggesting she seeks out sad people, that would be quite a condemnation of her mental health, and I assume that is probably not the case at all.

 

I'm curious, what thoughts did she have about your dream?

 

 

"SO why don't you present your definitions of love and falling in love?"

I should have given a definition in the original post, but the reason why I ask you this is because I think we probably would disagree on the definition given what you have said. My understand is that loving someone is the involuntary response to virtue if you are virtuous, but that this only grows over time and is a kind of sense of admiration, mutual respect, trust, support, likeness, etc. As I understand it, falling in love as it is often called is a deep hormonal response in the 'honeymoon period'. The big three. Lust, attachment and attraction. I don't see why those have to do something with virtue necessarily. From what I have read in RTR "The love bomb" and talking to others, this does not necessarily happen only to virtuous people. Perhaps I am wrong in that, but if I am, I want evidence or reason for why I should believe I'm wrong. Perhaps I misunderstood RTR, I'm only half way through.

Is it surprising to you that you lack the ecstasy feeling of lust, attachment, attraction? When you say that you have depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-esteem, it doesn't really surprise me at all that this is the case. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Mole    7

I would just like to rewind a bit because I'm a bit lost here.  You brought up the dream and with that, your girlfriend.  I said, in context of my reply to your post, that I hope you have the type of relationship where you can openly discuss your dream and possible meanings with her, as it would liekly be very enlightening, given that she is a featured character in the dream.  You replied that sometimes one can be "too open" and it would be harmful to a relationship.  I asked you to offer an example of "something of consequence" you shouldn't talk about openly.  You responded with not wanting to point out a pimple????  I'm not sure why we are even discussing this at all.  Again, I said, in complete context of just your dream and it's importance to you, that conversation with your girlfriend would likely be helpful.  I am curious why you would want to deflect that away to talking about the moral quandaries of politeness in the face of a pimple.

 

Ok, I dont know you so I cannot speak to your behaviors and what you're like.  It's certainly good news that she seems to be more connected to you now and can better empathize with your mood.  Lastly, I wasn't saying that she would be "attracted to the sad you", more that she might have a blind spot or lack of skills in assessing people.  I'm not suggesting she seeks out sad people, that would be quite a condemnation of her mental health, and I assume that is probably not the case at all.

 

I'm curious, what thoughts did she have about your dream?

 

Is it surprising to you that you lack the ecstasy feeling of lust, attachment, attraction? When you say that you have depressive symptoms and feelings of low self-esteem, it doesn't really surprise me at all that this is the case. 

I misunderstood you, and I agree. With a topic such as dreaming it is something to be talked about openly. Sorry.

 

She hasn't had much to say about the dream. I asked her if it would be okay to put it on the forums and she said it's fine. Since posting this, I have come up with some interpretations that I think are well supported. I told her that I have some new interpretations and she's really interested to hear it, but I've been really busy this week. I will find a time where I can talk to her about it.

 

I am not surprised that I lack that ecstasy. In fact, I feel the same as I was before I met her in general.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.